COMMON COURTESY

Something which should be simple, appears more difficult in our minds than it is in reality. Being able to speak words to another human being about our needs and plans should come easily. Yet, some people tend to assume that either the other person should know what we think or that we should not have to explain ourselves. We wrongly assume people are mind readers.

The plan as I understood it for today was that my son would be picked up around 10,00. Based on this, I awoke much earlier than I had wanted to on a Sunday morning so that we could have our special Sunday breakfast together, as is our tradition. Sage was going to spend a few hours on the boat at the lake with his father, sisters, and stepmother. At least that’s what we both thought.

The coffee was already on the table outside. On the balcony. I had moved the table away from the railing and placed it against the living room windows. As soon as the scones were out of the oven, I woke up my son and waited about five minutes before glazing the mini vanilla bean scones. That was shortly after 9,00.

We enjoyed our Sunday breakfast and my son kept checking his phone for any messages from his father. It wasn’t until sometime after noontime that he got a message from his older sister that they were on their way. I packaged up the remaining eight scones for him to take to his sisters.

I went about my day, cleaning up in the kitchen and going to get wrapping paper and a card for my son’s birthday tomorrow. The presents were ordered and on their way. The last two items having arrived at our doorstep whilst I was out.

As the hours passed and dinnertime approached, I still hadn’t heard anything from my son about when he would be coming home. I decided to wait and was no longer certain about our having dinner as we always do. Shortly before 20,00, I texted my son. No answer. I texted my daughters. The older one stated they were eating. I then texted my children’s father to ask when he would be returning our son. Also, no answer. I then called him but he immediately handed the phone to Sage, saying ‘This is for you’.

Since he refused to talk with me, I can only guess that his wife was about to have a hissy fit again for communicating with me. So, I had to remind my son that STAAR testing was tomorrow morning and he needed to be back soon so that he could get as much sleep as possible.

He said his phone died, he was unaware of the time, and did not know that they would be gone for so long. I reminded him that those are excuses and he should have asked his sisters to contact me. But really, this was an issue that his father should have taken up with me.

I was already out the door going on my evening walk when I made the calls. An hour later, as I was returning, I noticed three cars entering the driveway of the apartment complex. They came to a stop, waiting until I crossed. As I entered the gate, I noticed one of the cars, a Jeep, had stopped again. Then I noticed my son as he opened the door. Why in the world was he in that car?!

After questioning my son about his being driven home by his older stepbrother who is not supposed to even be around my children, and lecturing him about communicating his whereabouts when plans have changed, my son let me know that his father had to stay behind to help another boater who ran out of gas. I then sent a text to his father.

‘In the future, please communicate any changes in schedule. This is common courtesy. I was unaware that Sage would be gone all day…’. No answer.