EXTREME MEASURES

‘Why are you gonna walk me to school?’, he was clearly upset and did not think I would actually go through with my warning.

‘We discussed this over a week ago’, I was not going to back down this time.

The biggest lesson I’ve learned from the past few years has been to not give people too many chances. Because when you do, they take advantage of those chances and continue on the same path as before, knowing you will ‘forgive’ them and put up with their excuses again and again. It then becomes a matter of setting boundaries, letting everyone know they exist, and making sure people know you will not compromise for any reason.

I had informed my son that if I see any more notations in Home Access Center with ‘Late to Class but Present’ or ‘Unverified-Unexcused’, I would walk him to school. Not for the entire year, just until he got the point. This also meant that he could not meet up with his friend before school, thus preventing him from being late to his first class.

The consequences of continued absences have an impact on parents as well as students. According to the Texas Education Code, ‘The student’s parent is subject to prosecution…’ and ‘The student is subject to a referral to Truancy Court’. The school website continues to remind us that ‘It is the parent’s duty to monitor the student’s school attendance and require the student to attend school.’

Some people might believe that walking my son to school is unjust punishment, but when you give someone chance after chance to make things better and they continually show you that they are unreliable, you have to resort to extreme measures.

This all was brought about today when I saw him leaving our apartment complex with two ‘friends’ when he was supposed to be in gym class. Usually I’m home all day, but today I decided to go to the store on my lunch break. I stopped my car to ask what he was doing. He claimed nobody was in the gym. An email from the teacher claimed otherwise. I then told him to be home directly after school.

It was already getting to the point where he should have been home after the last class. I went to the clubhouse of our apartment complex, where he has been hanging out with friends after school, to see if he listened to my earlier warning. As soon as I walked around the corner to the room in the back, I saw him bolt out the side door. I then went inside the room, looked at the two friends, and told them my son will not be hanging out with them anymore. If the people he hangs out with cannot be a good influence, then they cannot be true friends.

All last year, I gave him the benefit of the doubt. Not so much this year. I hate having to be so strict and interfering, but I want him to learn an important lesson now instead of later in life when he’s an adult. Thus, preventing him from developing the habit of making excuses in his future relationships. The lesson is to be trustworthy. Which means to stay honest and to do what you say you’re going to do.

As we sat at the dinner table tonight, my son asked me once again. ‘Are you for real gonna walk me to school? Why? Do you want me to get bullied?’

That one’s on him now. He’s had plenty of chances to make things right and time to think about the consequences of his actions.